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.. my face was being pieced and stitched back together ... a little bit nearly every day. Here a piece, there a piece, EVERYWHERE a piece ... Old McDonald had a surgery ... E-I-E-I-O.Ow!Permanent black-eyes ... but I was beginning to look like sorta me.After looking at my latest undamaged photograph, the Plastics guy said, "While we're at it, we'll try and fix a few of mother natures practical jokes," and then he laughed. The photo was from my high school year book ... and everybody knows how flattering THEY are.I don't get it.Get what?Oops.Leaking?Looks like it but that's not what I don't get.Well?I ... dunno ... I should dislike you severely.But you don't?No. Since they fixed your face ... I like it.That's a bother.To you?Yeah.Why?As far as real life goes ... you're 14. But it's 1995, Windows 95 will be out in another month ... and the law says your delectable person is 35.My person is delectable?You bet."Aren't they cute," said the MED nurse to the HEAD nurse.The new patient. I'd never seen one like it. Each cup was so bigthat a basketball could have gotten lost in it. That explained the odddesign, with wide straps, extra hooks, reinforced eyes and so on. And atag explained why it seemed heavy--"titanium reinforced for maximumsupport" had been stitched on the tag in tiny script letters. Titanium?Steel wasn't good enough? How much weight was this bra supposed tohandle, anyway?There were still more boxes to open; there had been over two dozen tobegin with. And there were still more items of lingerie and suggestiveouter attire. And one more bra like the first, except in black and cutlower in front. I tried to imagine what a woman designed for that brawould look like in an outfit designed for it as well, but I couldn'tbegin to guess. The outfit itself turned up in the next box--a blackdress with a sort of open front, held together by a few laces that wouldleave not one millimeter of cleavage to the imagination. Another coupleof boxes turned out to.
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