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"I think he deserves to know everything, sweetheart."Gemma was silent, but her bottom lip stuck out in a real, unmistakable pout.Bill went on, turning back to me. "We think the baby is probably Mark's," he said, dropping his gaze to look steadfastly at the floor. "But it might be mine."I know my eyebrows shot up. Gemma was blushing and Mark was holding on to her tightly, looking at me impassively, as if daring me to criticise.I thought for a moment, then excused myself, left them alone in the lounge, and went in search of Chérie and her mother.I found my daughter first, poring over a magazine in her bedroom. She looked up and smiled."Chérie, darling," I began, "I need to ask you something."She patted the bed beside her. I sat down and she pressed herself against me, holding me in a pleasant cuddle."How would you feel about our coming clean to Uncle Bill, Auntie Portia and your cousins – I mean about your being pregnant, and who the father is?" What?" She sounded horrified. "After all. I felt horror, and shame, andembarrassment. Years of holding in this secret had separated me frommy mother and sister. I drove away my friends, everyone. I had pushedthem all away because I could not share my secret desire with anyone. Iwas too ashamed. I felt the blows of my stepfather and the hurt andanguish. I felt the hot flush on my face as girls giggled as theypassed me in the halls. His tears were my tears. I began heaving.Carlos, in my body, was holding me now, telling me it was all right! Iknew now both the pleasure and pain of being a man trapped in a spiralof passionate feminine desires. I wanted to become a woman more thananything in the world! This is so topsy-turvy."Carlos, I had no idea. I'm ashamed to admit that I've often wished Godwould turn me into a boy. I need to be more appreciative. No, I needto cherish, honor, and respect what I have." I put my arms around him,half expecting to be sucked back in but he simply pulled me close. Twowomen embracing;.
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