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"It's almost $300," she said, "but it's gorgeous, and I've heard really good things about this model." It's as big as all outdoors," Dan said."Nonsense. It's as big as a breadbox. Okay, a really, really large breadbox." Lucky for you I'm here to carry it out to your car," Dan said."Yes, I don't know what I'd do if I had to cart this all the way out to the car all by myself. Maybe I'd have had to ask one of the clerks here to help me. Oh, the humanity!" I'll bet you've got student loans like everything," Dan said, evidently making an oblique reference to the printer's high cost."Oh, yeah. I got 'em all right. But this novel of mine, it's going to be an enormous success. Oprah's gonna select it for her Book Club. It'll hit the New York Times Best-Seller List, and I'll pay off all my student loans in one swell foop!" Or you could just hook up with some overpaid professional athlete. Some aging-but-still-virile guy being paid obscene sums of money for periodic displays of incredible. It all started when my friend Cher’s wife passed away. He has been very depressed lately and lonely. He tried to go talk with girls, but he couldn’t concentrate because none of them were as good looking as his wife. I must admit that she is absolutely GORGEOUS. It was this night when we came to my house to watch football with me. When he came, my wife was taking the k**s to our parents’ house because that’s usually how it works. The k**s are at our parents’ house every week days and only come home on weekends. As being that, it was a Sunday night. My friend Cher came and it was only me there. We sat on the couches and talked about our lives in general. It went on and on, and we ended up with the topic of him finding a girl. He explained to me that none of the girls that he dated after his wife’s demise were hot, and he couldn’t get a full erection when having sex. He doesn’t get pleasurable sex like he used to. I felt bad for him. Then my wife came home and unlocked the door and went.
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