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Charles: And you don't agree I take it.Alan: Look, if she wants to talk to me all she has to do is open a chat window. We have a computer in the other room. I even set up an account for her on the sex fantasy site. You would think she would appreciate it but all did was complain about the screen name I picked.Charles: What was it?Alan: "MyLittleSlut6969."Charles: Hmmm....Alan: I mean it's not like I'm cheating on her. I told her the only f-word here is fantasy, right?Carrie: Did someone say the f-word? I wanna fuck!Alan: She says she is embarrassed to tell her friends I write sex stories for the net. She says I'm just an Internet pornographer. I told her someone has to write Internet pornography. I mean, it's not going to write itself, right?Pete: Here, here!Alan: She says me being on this sex fantasy site can only lead to no good. She says pretty soon I'll be hanging out with a bunch of perverts.(There is a murmur in the crowd.)Pete: Uh, we don't like that word here.Bob: No,. The woman (of indeterminate age) was clad in a long black satin cloak, embossed with the signs of the zodiac.“Welcome to Bedlam Hall. I am Tanya, official gatekeeper and your guide for the evening,” she announced in a husky voice, which had just a hint of an East European accent. Her unkempt jet-black hair hung menacingly across her mascara-ringed eyes. The only jewellery she wore was a necklace of filigree silver depicting a cobweb, in the centre of which a large black spider was devouring a yellow bee.The woman’s complexion was a deathly white, made more menacing by an ugly Z-shaped scar down one cheek. The lips of her down-turned mouth were blood red and slightly parted to reveal two fearsome incisors, and her red-painted nails were more like miniature talons.“And where is your nephew who travelled here with you? Nigel, I believe.”“Errm… we got waylaid on our way up from the car park. By a pack of ghoulish girls.”She gave a wry half-smile. “They’re mine.”“ALL of them?”“In a manner.
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