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At Jorge's nod, he continued with, "We have bullies, and they don't bother us as much when we're together," he admitted.Jorge turned back to Kim, considering that portion of the conversation closed, and stated flatly, "I belong to a gang. We 'hang out' together because it is safer. We protect one another. When necessary, we avenge one another."He looked around the table, beginning to get upset with these upright, white, examples of middle America. He was trying to help them, and they were treating him just like many of the other whites that he had met. He was certain JJ didn't feel that way. For some reason, she was allowing her children to deal with the consequences of their bigotry.JJ had touched him, so she knew what the young man was feeling, and thinking. Kim and Blake were only getting vague impressions. JJ could have steered the conversation into safer venues, or given them a clue about Jorge. She didn't because she wanted her children to figure this out on their own.. “Ssshhhh,” she soothed. “Its okay, love… sshhhh.”She nuzzled her face into my neck, and kissed me gently behind the ear. Her hand moved over my chest in a calming, circular motion.Slowly, my sense of panic began to subside. I was confused by the whole experience. I’d never - ever - had an anxiety attack before. Now I knew what they felt like, and I didn’t like it one bit. Loss of control was anathema to me.A few minutes later, my breathing almost back to normal, Kate and I finally talked.As we lay spooned together, I confessed that I was having serious trouble separating sex from sentiment. As my feelings had grown for her, so too had my difficulty watching her with other people. Particularly other men. “I thought I’d mastered this,” I told her, “Until I saw you with Jacob.”“Why Jacob?” Kate asked, genuinely perplexed. “I could understand it better if you had problems with Michelle - I mean, I actually fell in love with her. But Jacob? He was a nice guy, perfect for a fun one-nighter,.
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