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While high.So yeah I got zapped with 50,000 volts and died alone in my underwear and a Spice World T-shirt (it's comfy...don't judge!).The next thing I knew I was standing up looking down at myself. You really learn alot about life watching the smoke waft up from your burnt out eyesockets. The ultimate irony came when I tried to leave the apartment and found that I couldn't. I hardly ever went out in life, why would death be any different. When my body was finally discovered I couldn't even go with it (still don't know what happened to it, hope it was a good funeral!)It didn't really dawn on me that I was dead until they came to pack up my stuff. As I watched workmen pack up my most treasured belongings I couldn't help but wonder where it would go. I found myself alone, in an empty apartment trying to find some way of keeping entertained. I'm not sure how much time passed before a new renter came around. I didn't know what to expect until I saw her. Regan Brooks, my god was she. "I'll find somebody to put you all under arrest." He strode off down the hill, muttering something about "uppity women" and "this man's Army." Fuck you, Major," came from the rear ranks. Sounded like Pvt. Nick--I didn't even know he could get mad; he was always trying to pacify things."At ease," I shouted. "If I want to be stupid, that's fine. But nobody under my command is going to be stupid, you get me?" Suuuure, Sarge," I heard. I couldn't have this. Then I heard, "Oof!" LeAnna--I thought that was her name--must have poked him in the ribs. Much better. I just hate to have to break people's arms to get their attention."OK, Teresa," I said. "We're depending on you. Move out."She snapped to attention and saluted like she was at West Point. "Yes, Ma'am," she said."When you get back, remind me to confine you to quarters, Teresa," I said.She grinned. "OK, come on you guys, we're outta here." She motioned to Twassel and he lurched after her, trying to say something about not.
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