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Tingle have anyidea what it was like to grow up in a family where everything revolvedaround the sexual fancies of a kid brother?There was one exception - one moment in the onslaught of opinion whereKirk espied an opening. It was during Mr. Tingle's (by now)ritualistic condemnation of the Tea Parties as subversive, demagogic,racist and downright un-American. The teacher even mocked them as "teabaggers".Thanks to playground gossip, Kirk understood the insult being hurled atthe conservative activists who had organized "tea parties" ininstructive emulation of the destructive Boston Tea Party of 1773 toprotest against "taxation without representation". So he put up hishand for the first time in weeks and asked, his demeanor innocenceincarnate, his teacher to explain the term "tea bagger". Tingle, whoprided himself on his ability to discuss all things sexual with hissixth graders, patiently explained that tea bagging was originally gayslang for one man's putting his mouth entirely. I see myself in the mirror again. I can't believe how sexy I look.Especially when I smoke."Coming right up miss," he then says as he walks off towards the bar butnot before giving me a smile. I just smile back at him and take anotherdrag of my cigarette.I then decide to have another look in my handbag and I can't believe allthe things that are in it.Things like a purse, two different shades of lipstick, some eyeshadow,mascara, a tampon, my cigarettes of course, a pair of tights, a pair ofknickers, a pack of condoms and a card with a taxi service on it."Shit, I really am a fucking woman!!!" I say to myself in a low tone ofvoice as I finish off my cigarette and see the guy from the bar walkingtowards me."That will be ?4.80 please," the guy says as I hand him a five pound noteand tell him to keep the change."Thankyou miss," the guy says smiling at me as he goes back behind thebar. I look down at the drink and can't believe I've gone from drinking pintsto drinking double vodka.
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