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I told myself that it was like talking to a third cousin. I laughed, knowing that was the kind of thinking that could get me my own TV show again.The two men at the road block, within sight of the Monastery, were so busy watching the road that they didn't see me slip up on them. I had them covered with one of the chopped up AK47s by the time I cleared my throat to warn them."Now gentlemen, and I use that term loosely," I said in classical Spanish. "You may leave your rifles and anything else you brought with you and run like hell back down that road. Of course you can't stop till you get somewhere with a phone. If I find you on the road, I will kill you in a most painful manner ... Now run!" I watched with a smile as the two big strong men ran away from the skinny chick, with the really bad hair. I did of course have the chopped down AK47 on my side.I went up to the gate of the tiny walled city. There were a couple of buildings, which were in fact very old dormitory type buildings,. That wasnt a good sign, hes usually in his recliner watching some mindless television program. I actually stopped just inside the door thinking hmmm. what the hell? Youre late, he tells me, Whats up? I can tell by his voice and the look on his face hes pissed all over again. WTF? Before I get the chance to make up my mind if Im going to answer or just walk back out the door he says Come over here. Im not sure what made me do it but I just walked over to him in a whipped demeanor. Damn it! I was too tired for more shit! Im standing in front of him with my arms crossed and right leg extended like What the fuck do you want? He burned holes through me with his eyes and the next thing I know he reached over with lightning speed and smacked my ass Hard! I was so stunned I didnt make any movement besides the jerking of my pelvis from the smack. Im sure my mouth was hanging open but nothing came out. When I finally regained my senses I said Well, you mother fucker! My husband is fast, being.
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