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"We were on patrol," the man told me, lowering his voice and tone as he spoke, "out there as usual when we got attacked. The woman Mueller had ordered us this morning to sail near the big island to see what was going on there. As you probably know there'd been a couple of pirate attacks on the sea in the last couple of days and she wanted to find out who was doing it. Anyway, as we approached the big island, three odd looking vessels came out to intercept us. They had strange sails and they were also being rowed. Suspecting trouble I ordered my gunners to prepare for action. Then bang we got hit with something out of nowhere. It struck near the bow and it punched a hole in it. Then a second one hit the forecastle sending up splinters of wood. Not knowing what kind of weapon they were using and seeing that there were three ships heading for me, I decided to come about and get back here and report." Were there any casualties?" I asked the man with concern in my voice."Nothing major,". .She did not miss a snore! I however slept with a smile a mile wide!One to me! The next morning she was less than forthcoming holding her head and grunting some-thing about me being a lot quieter, till I unsympathetically slunk off to work leaving her to sort herself from her hangover. I returned at my usual time to a sumptuous meal complete with candles and beer, a sure sign in our house that my misses has either done something she is worried about, or she wants something and needs to butter me up first. The meal went down a treat, steak casserole mash carrots and dumplings, washed down with a beer followed by the finest apple pie and ice cream, then coffee.Knowing something was afoot; I did as all husbands do, enjoyed the meal and avoided subjects that I thought might be the one she wanted to get into, feeling like a man wearing hobnails and tiptoeing through a minefield I could not see the killer stroke coming so the conversation went something like this;“What would you think I.
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