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I felt the blood rush to my face. I froze; I looked around and saw no one. I closed the door and went to my desk, sitting down I felt sick to my stomach I had 20- 24 pictures in my hands. The first one was a picture of me from over head. I had my foot on the toilet in the girls' room and I was inserting the homemade Kotex cock in myself. There was a picture of myself making the dildo. Then I felt I was going to die when I found the picture of the dressing room under the stage. And saw Ann with the two boys. My mind was racing. To my self I was saying "please, please, no pictures of what I did" I hoped and hoped as I flipped the pictures that who ever took these did not see me or take picture of me when I used the two bottles. Then I saw them. I wanted to throw up. Someone not only saw me doing the most disgusting things to myself. But they took pictures of me doing them. I felt the tears swell up in my eyes.Who? Who did this? How? Taped to the back of the last photo was a note. It. "Yeah, you better."Weird as it sounds, my mom isn't a pageant mom at all. I mean, she supports me and everything and she helps me a lot, but I don't think it really means all that much to her. Except that it makes me happy of course, and she's proud, but you know what I mean. My mom's pretty normal about it, unlike some of those other mothers I've seen. It's life and death for those women. They're kinda crazy sometimes.My dad, on the other hand, isn't living or dying on whether or not I win a beauty pageant, but he is seriously into it. He thinks I'm the most beautiful, perfect girl in the world, which all fathers should think of their daughters, of course. He's the one who really gets excited when I win though, even more than I do.I'm not sure why that is, exactly, or what it means, and he tells me before a pageant starts that if I don't win he's still proud, but I'm always nervous that I'll disappoint my dad if I don't. The following spring I'd be entering the Miss Teen New York.
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